


Talk To Me

by ChoiAnnie



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-07-10 05:35:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15942830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChoiAnnie/pseuds/ChoiAnnie
Summary: "I want to tell you," Raven says, her voice breaks uncontrollably as she keeps talking, "but I don't want to cry again so soon.""No, no, it's okay." Murphy's quick to say. "You already look terrible enough, actually."





	Talk To Me

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! So, same as I said on my other story, I apologize for possible mistakes in the writing. I'm just learning English and this is the way I like the most to practice, but I hope you like it!

Waking up after a wide span of sleep is hard. It's hard because you feel confused and tired as if you haven't slept at all... So, now just imagine how hard would be waking up after more than a hundred years receiving the news that two of your closest friends aren't with you anymore.

  
Awful.

  
They are all reunited, just like the last time they did before getting into the cryo pods. All of them except for Shaw, who understood they needed some privacy... and except for Monty and Harper. Silence fills the entire room and the atmosphere turns so heavy that even breathing feels too gross. They take a minute of silence for them, like the start of a mourning they're probably never get to finish. Meeting Jordan at the same time is another bag of emotions, meaningful and heartbreaking emotions that are growing inside of them and will stay forever. An incredibly bitter gulp that makes their throats hurt so bad, same as their eyes as they all try to hold back the tears that they know are almost impossible to control.

  
Murphy has to squeeze his eyes so the tears that were accumulated can fall down and clear his sight. Once he does it, he stares at Raven, who is on the other side of the room leaned against the table. Tears run down her face but her lost look shows she isn't even paying attention anymore. He wishes he could get closer and hold her hand to comfort her, but he's holding Emori's hand instead and he knows she needs him too. So he just conforms with keep looking at her until Raven reacts, looking up at him. She stays staring at him a few seconds and suddenly breaks their eye contact, maybe because he was making her feel uncomfortable with his insistent glare.

  
"So what do we do now?" Murphy finally asks, even when he didn't want to do it. Everybody had that question in their mind, actually, but anyone wanted to ask about it.

  
"We do what they wanted for us to do." Bellamy says letting out a sigh. "Living a different life." 

Murphy opens his mouth to speak, but before he can say anything Raven catches his attention standing up and walking through the room while everybody watches her confused.

  
"Raven!" Echo tries to go behind her, but Raven stops abruptly and turns to face her with a shattered, sad look on her face.

  
"Leave me alone!" She elevates her voice, although it's not very loud because she hasn't enough energy to yell, and without losing one more second she walks towards the door and leaves the room.

  
"I'll go with her." Murphy says and goes after Raven ignoring every voice who called him behind. He doesn't want to loose her from his sight, otherwise finding her inside the ship would just make him waste too much time.

  
Murphy doesn't know exactly why is he doing this, why is he following her instead of staying behind as the rest of his friends have done. He wants to help her, he always wants to help her but most of the times he just doesn't know how to do it. He doesn't even expect for Raven to recognize or appreciate anything he does for her, he just wants to be able to make her feel better in some way, for once in his life.

  
Raven hears Murphy's footsteps approaching hers and she turns her head to see who is following her. She wants to repeat him she needs to be alone, but her head aches so bad and forcing her voice just would make it worse. What's more, Murphy's casually one of the people she should have a talk with, so she stops and turns to wait for him. That's where she realizes she's having trouble to control her breath as well, and it gets more difficult with every second.

  
"Raven..." Murphy starts to say once he's in front of her, but Raven interrupts him taking his hand and leading him into the nearest room she can find. She shouldn't put herself in a very closed space right now, but she prefers having a crisis in private than in the hallway where everyone could witness it.

So that's how they end among the cryo pods and among all the people they haven't woken up yet, just because they wanted to solve what to do when everybody's awake before they do it.

  
"I can't..." Raven gasps and leans against the closed door, she presses a hand on her chest while she desperately struggles to say another word. Tears keep falling down her cheeks because she isn't even trying to control them anymore. She's too busy trying to make the throbbing pain inside her chest disappear once and for all.

  
"It's okay, Raven," Murphy nervously reacts grabbing her by her shoulders, "calm down."

  
"I can't..." She repeats, her voice barely audible. "Murphy..."

  
"Try to breathe slowly." He says as softly as he can, maintaining his eyes on hers all the time. "It's okay, you'll be okay." But Raven just shakes her head in denial and keeps catching air abruptly.

  
"They..." She starts to say, but Murphy doesn't let her finish.

  
"Hey, hey, look at me." He murmurs and cups her face on his hands, wiping apart the humidity from her cheeks. "I'm here with you, Raven, you're safe and that's the only thing you need to have in your mind right now. Just breathe, okay?"

  
He has no idea of what's going on with her. Is she having a panic attack, maybe? He doesn't even know if Raven has ever had a panic attack before. However, he needs to stop it as soon as possible. Murphy doesn't really know how to reassure her, but he wants to be able enough to do it without asking someone else for help. Not only for him but for Raven too, because he's pretty sure she doesn't want to be surrounded by few people worrying about her situation.

  
Murphy keeps trying to calm her down implementing all the patience he didn't even know he could have. Fortunately, several seconds later Raven slowly starts to recover her normal breathing and he lets out a sigh of relief. Murphy knows how careful he needs to be with what he says right now, so he decides no to say anything until Raven's ready to speak first. He just waits there, staring at her as she closes her eyes and takes a deep breath to bring her voice back.

  
"Murphy..." Raven says then, but a second later her eyes are filled with tears again, "I'm sorry." She tells him, and for Murphy's surprise, next thing she does is wrapping her arms around his shoulders carelessly. "I'm sorry." She repeats and hugs him tightly, tears instantly wetting the fabric of his shirt as she lets them out freely. 

  
Murphy doesn't understand why is she apologizing for, but at least he knows she feels guilty for something else and that's why she's so distressed now. So, instead of asking something, he puts his arms around her waist, rubbing her back softly while she keeps crying on his shoulder. It's the first time Murphy sees Raven crying in such desperately way, like if she has been bearing it for so long. Maybe it began the day she went down to the ground many years ago; maybe she's just tired of seeing the people she cares about dying and even sacrificing for them. It's frustrating, he knows how horrible it feels, so he can't blame her for exploding like she's doing right now. Raven deserves a moment of relief. She's so strong, she's one of the strongest people Murphy has ever met before, but even the strongest person in the universe has the right to be weak sometimes. She isn't a machine that doesn't feel anything and never makes a mistake, none of them are. They can fall, they can cry and they can yell so loud that the anger that's been increasing inside of them finally comes out as a desperately and horrible crying. But this only happens when they think it's enough; enough pain, enough sacrifice, enough open wounds and enough spilled blood for the moment. Only when it's enough suffering for the wide limit they can bear.

  
But it doesn't happen very often.

  
"Do you want to tell me about it?" Murphy murmurs on Raven's ear when he feels her more relaxed in his arms, which takes a couple minutes, but only after that she starts feeling relieved, tears gradually stop sprouting from her eyes and the weight of her body feels lighter now. She pulls a few centimetres apart to look at Murphy, who has a surprisingly worried look on his face that Raven has never seen before. That's the moment she realizes he can see how broken she is. He can see it through her eyes and he's looking at her as if he wants to fix her in some way... as if he wants to put all the pieces together again.

 

That's the moment she realizes he really cares about her.

  
_Unbelievable._

.  
"I want to tell you," Raven says, her voice breaks uncontrollably as she keeps talking, "but I don't want to cry again so soon."

  
"No, no, it's okay." Murphy's quick to say. "You already look terrible enough, actually." He jokes trying to make her think about something else, even if those thoughts are all about how much she hates him for being such ridiculous every single minute of his life. Anyway, he finally frees some of the tension he was bearing when Raven chuckles slightly at his comment and pushes him apart by his shoulders.

  
"What a way of making me feel better, Murphy." 


End file.
